1
00:00:02,000 --> 00:00:03,239
Action.

2
00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:06,879
Welcome to Smiling Spring Care Home.

3
00:00:06,880 --> 00:00:09,759
We may not look like
spring chickens,

4
00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:12,440
but this place is all go-go-go.

5
00:00:13,520 --> 00:00:16,079
This programme contains
strong language and adult humour

6
00:00:16,080 --> 00:00:17,080
Hello.

7
00:00:18,760 --> 00:00:20,680
ALARM

8
00:00:23,240 --> 00:00:25,759
And what really makes it special?

9
00:00:25,760 --> 00:00:27,599
The people.

10
00:00:27,600 --> 00:00:33,519
We've been meeting on Tuesdays. We
organise a selection of fun snacks

11
00:00:33,520 --> 00:00:37,839
and we've been whipping up
our very own movie idea.

12
00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:42,079
Just imagine the look
on my family's faces

13
00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:46,360
when they sit down to watch
a movie that Gran came up with.

14
00:00:47,800 --> 00:00:55,159
How about a movie about a group
of retirees who are sick

15
00:00:55,160 --> 00:01:00,159
{\an8}of all these awful online scammers?

16
00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:04,679
{\an8}So they go inside the computer

17
00:01:04,680 --> 00:01:08,080
{\an8}and defeat them once and for all.

18
00:01:10,840 --> 00:01:13,040
This video was filmed on the iPad.

19
00:01:14,920 --> 00:01:17,560
ALL: We want you to help us.

20
00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:21,719
Wow. They are so much fun.

21
00:01:21,720 --> 00:01:23,999
I just want to squeeze them.

22
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:27,239
You know, I actually get along
better with old people.

23
00:01:27,240 --> 00:01:29,759
We just have this connection.
They love me.

24
00:01:29,760 --> 00:01:33,439
Ooh, that'll come in handy.
They don't seem very tech savvy.

25
00:01:33,440 --> 00:01:35,799
I'll have to introduce them
to Superbreast.

26
00:01:35,800 --> 00:01:38,399
What? My interactive OS.

27
00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:40,199
Hello, Sebastian.

28
00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:43,799
Are you feeling better?
Is that your girlfriend?

29
00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:47,760
No, we're just mates.
Completely platonic relationship.

30
00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:52,599
I think we might keep
Superbreast on the down low,

31
00:01:52,600 --> 00:01:53,600
if that's all right.

32
00:01:55,280 --> 00:01:58,200
Enjoy the rest of your birthday,
Sebastian.

33
00:02:20,320 --> 00:02:23,600
Shut up. Shut up. Shut up.
Shut up. Shut up.

34
00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:35,999
VOICEOVER: We arrived at
Smiling Spring,

35
00:02:36,000 --> 00:02:39,839
eager to aid the plight
of these overlooked senior citizens.

36
00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:42,800
First we met with the
home's director, Mrs Livingstone.

37
00:02:44,280 --> 00:02:47,879
So this isn't a documentary about
what we're feeding them, is it?

38
00:02:47,880 --> 00:02:50,959
No. It's more of a dystopian
sci-fi satire.

39
00:02:50,960 --> 00:02:52,000
Great.

40
00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:54,639
It must disgust you the way

41
00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:57,879
our society has turned its back
on our ancestors.

42
00:02:57,880 --> 00:03:01,199
They're still so vital.
They deserve respect.

43
00:03:01,200 --> 00:03:04,039
Right. Can I just warn you?
They do tend to take the piss.

44
00:03:04,040 --> 00:03:06,039
So I recommend using a firm hand.

45
00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:08,199
I'm not sure that'll be necessary.

46
00:03:08,200 --> 00:03:11,759
The last thing we want to do
is disturb their delicate ecosystem.

47
00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:15,119
Well, I'd be careful.
I'll be ducking in and out trying

48
00:03:15,120 --> 00:03:17,119
to get the money back
from this Swiss company.

49
00:03:17,120 --> 00:03:21,239
Can you believe they sent us
the CRX 0054?

50
00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:23,919
What's that?
Tanning bed.

51
00:03:23,920 --> 00:03:26,839
I ordered the CRX 0056.

52
00:03:26,840 --> 00:03:28,520
Euthanasia pod.

53
00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:31,999
Oh. I'm going to be the combat

54
00:03:32,000 --> 00:03:36,039
specialist choreographing most
of the battle scenes, so, yeah.

55
00:03:36,040 --> 00:03:39,279
OK, that sounds fun. Yeah, well,

56
00:03:39,280 --> 00:03:42,319
considering some of the futuristic
weapons I've been devising...

57
00:03:42,320 --> 00:03:44,839
I have to take a nap.

58
00:03:44,840 --> 00:03:45,959
Again?

59
00:03:45,960 --> 00:03:48,879
I've never really thought
about getting old.

60
00:03:48,880 --> 00:03:55,039
I suppose I'll learn about wine
and coins and shit like that.

61
00:03:55,040 --> 00:03:56,480
Winnie, you're already old.

62
00:03:57,960 --> 00:03:59,519
Older. Old-er.

63
00:03:59,520 --> 00:04:01,799
I overheard Sam say
that when we finish here,

64
00:04:01,800 --> 00:04:03,759
we'll probably leave you
to live forever.

65
00:04:03,760 --> 00:04:04,959
Horseshit.

66
00:04:04,960 --> 00:04:07,320
It's an above-ground cemetery.

67
00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:20,039
VOICEOVER: The residents were taking
their weekly aqua aerobics class.

68
00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:23,440
Little did they know,
their lives were about to change.

69
00:04:25,280 --> 00:04:29,119
They didn't have a clue
that I was lurking beneath them,

70
00:04:29,120 --> 00:04:31,280
swimming betwixt their legs.

71
00:04:32,320 --> 00:04:34,120
Believe me, I didn't touch her!

72
00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:48,039
You know, when I go to see a film,

73
00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:51,559
I often close my eyes
for the entire duration.

74
00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:52,599
Huh?

75
00:04:52,600 --> 00:04:55,040
The sound is everything.

76
00:04:56,480 --> 00:04:58,839
You've got a different
towel than everyone else.

77
00:04:58,840 --> 00:05:02,839
I enjoy the finer things.
I had it monogrammed.

78
00:05:02,840 --> 00:05:04,880
Y...Z.

79
00:05:06,160 --> 00:05:08,759
Powerful initials.

80
00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:11,359
Right up the back of the alphabet.

81
00:05:11,360 --> 00:05:13,080
Right up the back.

82
00:05:15,440 --> 00:05:17,359
Yardley.

83
00:05:17,360 --> 00:05:18,360
Pat.

84
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:22,039
What does the Z stand for?

85
00:05:22,040 --> 00:05:24,719
Zelensky. No relation.

86
00:05:24,720 --> 00:05:27,839
SAM: Trust Pat to get involved
with the home's wealthy Casanova

87
00:05:27,840 --> 00:05:31,079
on day one.
I was busy getting to know Sybil.

88
00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:32,159
What a woman.

89
00:05:32,160 --> 00:05:35,839
You know the idea was inspired
by true events?

90
00:05:35,840 --> 00:05:37,439
You're joking.

91
00:05:37,440 --> 00:05:41,399
No! I actually was the victim
of a computer scam.

92
00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:43,239
My family thought I was losing it

93
00:05:43,240 --> 00:05:45,559
and said I'd better come
and live here.

94
00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:48,439
I had no clue.
Thank you for sharing that.

95
00:05:48,440 --> 00:05:49,440
Oh.

96
00:05:50,760 --> 00:05:52,959
Oh, you poor thing.

97
00:05:52,960 --> 00:05:55,039
Oh, Nana Banana,

98
00:05:55,040 --> 00:05:58,239
please don't ever fall over
onto some tiles.

99
00:05:58,240 --> 00:06:00,679
Do you want something warm?
Maybe you want a brooch.

100
00:06:00,680 --> 00:06:01,919
I can get you that.

101
00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:04,440
No, no, you're hurting me. OK.
Jess!

102
00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:08,439
Maybe do a lap, yeah?

103
00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:10,440
Cool off. Yeah.

104
00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:21,799
So all of our families are coming
to watch the movie. Uh-huh.

105
00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:24,359
That's right, isn't it? Yeah.

106
00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:26,599
SHE CHUCKLES

107
00:06:26,600 --> 00:06:29,119
What battle experience do you have?

108
00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:31,319
I boxed at Repton Hall.

109
00:06:31,320 --> 00:06:33,119
I fought Honey Jeff Timmerman.

110
00:06:33,120 --> 00:06:36,039
I'll be teaching a much more
exciting style than that.

111
00:06:36,040 --> 00:06:37,999
We'll get you up on your feet
in a second.

112
00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:40,720
You'll be wielding plasma daggers, naturally.

113
00:06:42,240 --> 00:06:43,440
Are you new?

114
00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:46,519
What room are you in?

115
00:06:46,520 --> 00:06:49,999
I don't go here.
I'm with the film crew.

116
00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:54,679
That's Bud. He's been here
the longest out of anyone.

117
00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:56,199
He looks majorly angry.

118
00:06:56,200 --> 00:07:00,639
We shut down his book club
to focus on the movie idea.

119
00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:02,839
He didn't take it so well.

120
00:07:02,840 --> 00:07:05,720
You must be the big shot director.

121
00:07:06,880 --> 00:07:09,600
No, no, no, I'm...
You think you're better than us?

122
00:07:10,720 --> 00:07:11,720
Watch yourself.

123
00:07:15,000 --> 00:07:16,840
I'll send you into orbit.

124
00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:20,000
HE SPITS

125
00:07:25,000 --> 00:07:28,479
Note to self - that was awkward.

126
00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:30,720
Oh, Sam, you are a gas.

127
00:07:38,320 --> 00:07:40,519
The storm was raging.

128
00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:44,080
Waves the size
of skyscrapers crashing down.

129
00:07:45,560 --> 00:07:47,279
We nearly died.

130
00:07:47,280 --> 00:07:49,279
KNOCK AT DOOR

131
00:07:49,280 --> 00:07:51,239
Sorry - roommate.

132
00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:52,560
I'm decent.

133
00:08:00,840 --> 00:08:02,200
You all right, Bud?

134
00:08:05,360 --> 00:08:08,079
I'd love to see your boat sometime.

135
00:08:08,080 --> 00:08:09,560
I'll bet you would.

136
00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:12,559
What was that?

137
00:08:12,560 --> 00:08:15,439
She's got dollar signs
in her eyes, mate.

138
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:18,599
SAM: This bud fellow was turning out
to be a real headache.

139
00:08:18,600 --> 00:08:21,839
Thankfully, the other residents
were fully on board

140
00:08:21,840 --> 00:08:23,199
and ready to turn over.

141
00:08:23,200 --> 00:08:25,479
? Empty playgrounds

142
00:08:25,480 --> 00:08:28,279
? Churches closing down

143
00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:32,239
? What's happened to our children?

144
00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:35,639
? What's happened to our town?

145
00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:42,599
? How could this little grey box
cause so much misery?

146
00:08:42,600 --> 00:08:46,159
? You're forgetting,
little grey box

147
00:08:46,160 --> 00:08:50,359
? I still have fight in me... ?

148
00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:51,879
And me too.

149
00:08:51,880 --> 00:08:53,639
We're coming with you.

150
00:08:53,640 --> 00:08:54,959
Me also.

151
00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:58,279
ALL:
the computer

152
00:08:58,280 --> 00:09:04,680
? We're going inside the computer. ?

153
00:09:18,120 --> 00:09:20,519
I'm the Digital Bastard.

154
00:09:20,520 --> 00:09:23,280
Welcome to my online wasteland.

155
00:09:24,640 --> 00:09:27,279
? Crash the market
Too much news

156
00:09:27,280 --> 00:09:29,959
? Graphic content that isn't true

157
00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:32,759
? One wrong click
Scotland Yard

158
00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:35,319
? Hurts to type
Credit card

159
00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:38,159
? Take your money
Steal your house

160
00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:41,159
? Turn your grandson upside down. ?

161
00:09:41,160 --> 00:09:44,959
He doesn't look like that.
And we won't stop until

162
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:48,639
we have corrupted every first-born
in England. Ha-ha-ha!

163
00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:49,920
Ha-ha-ha...

164
00:09:51,160 --> 00:09:54,519
Cut! OK,
that was kind of incredible.

165
00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:57,359
I felt an actual shiver go down
my spine. I'm not joking.

166
00:09:57,360 --> 00:10:00,039
Have all the invites gone out
for the big premiere

167
00:10:00,040 --> 00:10:01,519
to all our families?

168
00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:03,999
Families, yeah, yeah, yeah.
We can sort it out.

169
00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:06,519
Jess. Oh, that was so good.

170
00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:10,319
The scammers looked so frightening.
I made you some brownies.

171
00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:13,879
Do you want one?
Perhaps later. Have one now.

172
00:10:13,880 --> 00:10:15,119
Early bird gets the worm.

173
00:10:15,120 --> 00:10:17,400
I'm just going to borrow
her for a second.

174
00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:20,880
WHISPERS THROUGH MIC: Ooh, baby.

175
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,559
You're looking sexy.

176
00:10:25,560 --> 00:10:28,319
Ooh, I want you.

177
00:10:28,320 --> 00:10:31,440
Ooh, cappuccino.

178
00:10:33,280 --> 00:10:36,320
I'm just going to jump into my
thermals. It's too cold in here.

179
00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:42,319
You dirty little monkey.

180
00:10:42,320 --> 00:10:43,880
You're playing him, aren't you?

181
00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:48,039
Oi. Get off! You ticked off Bud.

182
00:10:48,040 --> 00:10:50,080
He's looking to set
a fight with you.

183
00:10:52,920 --> 00:10:55,199
Now, this is serious.

184
00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:56,679
Tell him it's on.

185
00:10:56,680 --> 00:10:57,879
Hang on a second.

186
00:10:57,880 --> 00:10:59,199
He'll fight.

187
00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:01,519
Good on you, Pat.

188
00:11:01,520 --> 00:11:03,359
What have you done that for?

189
00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:06,879
Well, it'll be good to get Bud
out of the picture... for everyone.

190
00:11:06,880 --> 00:11:09,039
I'm not a fighter.
Well...

191
00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:12,120
Yo, yo, yo.
I may be of some assistance.

192
00:11:13,560 --> 00:11:17,200
I'm going to turn you
into a killing machine.

193
00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:21,320
Business card.

194
00:11:22,480 --> 00:11:24,199
You are bombing!

195
00:11:24,200 --> 00:11:26,719
I've received a slew of complaints.

196
00:11:26,720 --> 00:11:30,279
What? Have you been doing
makeovers?

197
00:11:30,280 --> 00:11:33,719
Humphrey told me you pierced his
navel when he was sleeping.

198
00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:35,479
I don't think so.

199
00:11:35,480 --> 00:11:38,679
Jess, am I going to have to
let you go?

200
00:11:38,680 --> 00:11:41,359
What? Get it together.

201
00:11:41,360 --> 00:11:42,400
Yeah.

202
00:11:45,120 --> 00:11:48,599
VOICEOVER: The next morning we
regrouped for a warmish breakfast.

203
00:11:48,600 --> 00:11:50,560
An army marches on its stomach.

204
00:11:52,600 --> 00:11:54,959
Oh, by the way,
your son RSVP'd last night.

205
00:11:54,960 --> 00:11:57,119
He and Denise are
coming to the screening.

206
00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:59,440
Oh, that's wonderful news.

207
00:12:01,280 --> 00:12:03,279
Don't smooch the messenger.

208
00:12:03,280 --> 00:12:04,919
We got a lot to squeeze in today.

209
00:12:04,920 --> 00:12:07,679
You triple morph the
Scamquidos to Catholicism.

210
00:12:07,680 --> 00:12:09,880
We may be able to do
a bit of that, sure.

211
00:12:11,160 --> 00:12:13,120
I was hoping we could do
a lot of that.

212
00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:16,479
Well, there may be a schedule clash,
Sammy.

213
00:12:16,480 --> 00:12:20,159
We've got gardening today
and then backgammon at noon.

214
00:12:20,160 --> 00:12:22,119
And then we do Zumba.

215
00:12:22,120 --> 00:12:25,879
And then we sit down and listen
to our radio programmes.

216
00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:28,639
Oh, I'm afraid that
will all have to be postponed.

217
00:12:28,640 --> 00:12:29,960
Absolutely not.

218
00:12:31,120 --> 00:12:34,519
I couldn't learn my
lines last night.

219
00:12:34,520 --> 00:12:35,840
I couldn't focus.

220
00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,840
I was yearning for you.

221
00:12:41,720 --> 00:12:44,039
When did you last update your will?

222
00:12:44,040 --> 00:12:47,520
I'm always making
pertinent adjustments.

223
00:12:49,960 --> 00:12:52,000
We must be alone together.

224
00:12:53,680 --> 00:12:57,360
If only I didn't have
bitter old Bud as a roommate.

225
00:12:58,800 --> 00:13:00,999
I'm working on it.

226
00:13:01,000 --> 00:13:03,880
Are you sure I'm only
allowed to eat hash browns?

227
00:13:05,320 --> 00:13:08,399
The outcome
of this fight depends on it.

228
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:10,840
This shape is important.

229
00:13:15,520 --> 00:13:18,519
PHONE RINGS

230
00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:20,840
IN SPANISH:

231
00:13:46,920 --> 00:13:48,320
LINE DISCONNECTS

232
00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:55,959
? I see the light

233
00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:58,319
? I filled my cup

234
00:13:58,320 --> 00:14:01,279
? My ship has sailed

235
00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:03,160
? My time is up

236
00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:07,040
? Farewell and goodbye. ?

237
00:14:08,400 --> 00:14:14,000
Now go quickly before the grooming
gang recharge their quantum blaster.

238
00:14:15,280 --> 00:14:16,440
Oh.

239
00:14:18,920 --> 00:14:20,719
We'll miss you, Sybil.

240
00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:22,359
And cut.

241
00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:24,079
It's not too bad.

242
00:14:24,080 --> 00:14:26,319
I feel like we're losing
some of that energy.

243
00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:27,879
It was fine.

244
00:14:27,880 --> 00:14:30,639
Let's go from the top.
Let's move on.

245
00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:33,519
Look, just give us a bit
of a breather, if you don't mind.

246
00:14:33,520 --> 00:14:35,119
I'm tired.

247
00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:38,839
When the phone's on 2%,
you can still use all the apps.

248
00:14:38,840 --> 00:14:42,519
My apps went all big on me.
Let's take five.

249
00:14:42,520 --> 00:14:44,560
I'm worried their
commitment is waning.

250
00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:49,679
That euthanasia part sounds
pretty good to me right now.

251
00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:50,759
Jess.

252
00:14:50,760 --> 00:14:52,600
I want to die.
No!

253
00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:58,159
Oh, I need you to win this fight.
I've got a lot riding on it.

254
00:14:58,160 --> 00:15:02,439
I need to focus on Sebastian's
fatal finishing move.

255
00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:03,800
Remind me what that is again.

256
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:08,439
Where you jump in the air
and punch them with both fists

257
00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:11,280
and kick them with both feet
all at the same time.

258
00:15:12,480 --> 00:15:13,960
Pioneered by the Aztecs.

259
00:15:15,720 --> 00:15:17,680
Sebastian, get over here.

260
00:15:19,640 --> 00:15:21,079
What up?

261
00:15:21,080 --> 00:15:23,279
Have you ever been in a fight?

262
00:15:23,280 --> 00:15:24,919
Define for me what you mean.

263
00:15:24,920 --> 00:15:28,559
Have you ever been
in a physical fight?

264
00:15:28,560 --> 00:15:31,479
Depends on the parameters...
Have you?

265
00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:34,919
Not technically. Winnie,
I'll be taking over your training.

266
00:15:34,920 --> 00:15:38,359
He's my protege.
You're sacked.

267
00:15:38,360 --> 00:15:39,759
You're going to need a change.

268
00:15:39,760 --> 00:15:41,039
Sybil, I think you're right.

269
00:15:41,040 --> 00:15:43,159
Let's move on to the
battle of Cyberloo.

270
00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:46,199
I think we're done here for the
day, Sammy, we've got a lot on.

271
00:15:46,200 --> 00:15:47,359
Yeah, about that...

272
00:15:47,360 --> 00:15:50,719
Surely you've got enough
footage from yesterday.

273
00:15:50,720 --> 00:15:53,279
Besides, when all
the relatives arrive,

274
00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:56,399
they'll probably only want
to watch a little snippet,

275
00:15:56,400 --> 00:16:00,159
and then we can all
catch up properly.

276
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:01,799
You don't care, do you?

277
00:16:01,800 --> 00:16:03,759
You don't care about
this movie at all.

278
00:16:03,760 --> 00:16:06,239
You just want to see your family.

279
00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:09,159
This whole time you lied to me.

280
00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:12,399
Did you even get scammed?
Of course!

281
00:16:12,400 --> 00:16:15,759
If that Jeremy Corbyn can't handle
a couple of death threats,

282
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:19,039
what's he doing putting his
email address on his website?

283
00:16:19,040 --> 00:16:21,559
That's what you think
getting scammed is?

284
00:16:21,560 --> 00:16:25,879
Try not to scrunch up
your nose, darling.

285
00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:27,800
It makes you look like a rat.

286
00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:32,439
VOICEOVER: Honestly, I felt
like I'd been scammed.

287
00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:35,160
Sybil's confession took
a real toll on the team.

288
00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:40,119
We have to get as far away
from these people as we can.

289
00:16:40,120 --> 00:16:41,999
There's a darkness there.

290
00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:43,759
Yeah, let's head off.

291
00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:45,679
Yeah, we'll give it a try.

292
00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:48,399
Old people have no
honour whatsoever.

293
00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:50,719
Steady on. I vote that we stay.

294
00:16:50,720 --> 00:16:53,799
We've still got a lot
we could learn from them.

295
00:16:53,800 --> 00:16:56,799
Please. We all know
what you're after.

296
00:16:56,800 --> 00:16:58,960
SUPERBREAST: I have to agree
with Pat here.

297
00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:01,759
Superbreast, you don't get it.

298
00:17:01,760 --> 00:17:04,719
Sorry, but I did
a little bit of research.

299
00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:07,959
All of the dominant
civilisations throughout history

300
00:17:07,960 --> 00:17:11,359
have a deep reverence
for their elders.

301
00:17:11,360 --> 00:17:13,959
Sam, I know you feel hurt,

302
00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:18,479
but you can't expect everyone here
to have the same passion

303
00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:22,759
and understanding
of the film-making process as you.

304
00:17:22,760 --> 00:17:26,359
When they see the movie, it will
all become clear to them.

305
00:17:26,360 --> 00:17:29,039
Don't give up. Let them see it.

306
00:17:29,040 --> 00:17:31,519
Make them see it.

307
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:33,879
Superbreast, I needed that.

308
00:17:33,880 --> 00:17:37,919
Sam, you must hear this a lot,
but I'm a big fan.

309
00:17:37,920 --> 00:17:39,639
Oh, yeah? I'd love to
pick your brain...

310
00:17:39,640 --> 00:17:41,359
Let's get to work, I reckon.

311
00:17:41,360 --> 00:17:43,599
I've seen the Sainsbury's Trilogy
six times.

312
00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:45,199
I think she's got a virus.
Stop hogging it.

313
00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:48,159
ALL:
A very old bridge

314
00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:50,359
? A very old bridge indeed

315
00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:54,679
? A very big oval
Very big oval, very big oval seed

316
00:17:54,680 --> 00:17:57,639
? It was a very long walk
A very long walk... ?

317
00:17:57,640 --> 00:17:59,639
Turn off that crap!

318
00:17:59,640 --> 00:18:02,839
Everyone against the wall!
You heard me.

319
00:18:02,840 --> 00:18:06,599
Everyone stand against
the fucking wall now!

320
00:18:06,600 --> 00:18:09,959
A few of you seem to have forgotten
who calls the shots around here.

321
00:18:09,960 --> 00:18:12,759
Now, your precious families
will be here tomorrow,

322
00:18:12,760 --> 00:18:15,279
and I want to make them proud.

323
00:18:15,280 --> 00:18:17,799
I know you have a blockbuster
inside of you.

324
00:18:17,800 --> 00:18:21,839
I'm going to rip it out.
Is that understood?

325
00:18:21,840 --> 00:18:24,039
Is that understood?

326
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:26,159
No more breaks, no more Zumba!

327
00:18:26,160 --> 00:18:27,839
Can I just ask a quick question?

328
00:18:27,840 --> 00:18:31,639
No, you may noooooooot!

329
00:18:31,640 --> 00:18:35,360
THEY SHOUT MOCK MILITARY ORDERS

330
00:18:37,840 --> 00:18:41,159
They just needed a bit
of encouragement, really.

331
00:18:41,160 --> 00:18:45,799
Someone to believe in them.
Besides, the megabyte tarantuloid

332
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:49,599
and her digi-eggs weren't exactly
going to vanquish themselves.

333
00:18:49,600 --> 00:18:52,799
Oh, I don't think we've ever
had this many visitors.

334
00:18:52,800 --> 00:18:56,919
What a treat. So how about a huge
round of applause

335
00:18:56,920 --> 00:19:03,399
for our fantastic residents
for doing this movie project?

336
00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:05,200
SCATTERED APPLAUSE

337
00:19:08,880 --> 00:19:10,719
Enough.

338
00:19:10,720 --> 00:19:15,439
No talking, no coughing,
no diabetes, no fidgeting.

339
00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:17,320
I'm looking at you, Smalley.

340
00:19:18,560 --> 00:19:20,039
Mate.

341
00:19:20,040 --> 00:19:22,879
Thank you. Roll the tape.

342
00:19:22,880 --> 00:19:25,199
? Empty playgrounds

343
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:27,719
? Churches closing down... ?

344
00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:31,519
We can leave as soon as this
shit is over. 100%.

345
00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:34,079
? What happened to our... ?

346
00:19:34,080 --> 00:19:36,000
LASER BLASTS

347
00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:55,119
? I filled my cup

348
00:19:55,120 --> 00:19:58,039
? My ship has sailed

349
00:19:58,040 --> 00:19:59,800
? My time is up

350
00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,680
? Farewell and goodbye. ?

351
00:20:08,280 --> 00:20:11,119
I'll miss you, Sybil.
She was who she was

352
00:20:11,120 --> 00:20:12,920
and you knew
where you were with her.

353
00:20:14,120 --> 00:20:17,399
OK, so that's the interval now.

354
00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:22,319
Don't forget to go to the
toilet and we'll see you in 15...

355
00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:24,239
Oh, hold on. Change of plans.

356
00:20:24,240 --> 00:20:27,239
We have organised
half-time entertainment.

357
00:20:27,240 --> 00:20:29,519
Some of the guys are
going to have a fight.

358
00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:31,440
CLAMOUR

359
00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:36,719
There you have it.

360
00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:39,359
My last will and testament.

361
00:20:39,360 --> 00:20:41,959
Managed to squeeze you in.

362
00:20:41,960 --> 00:20:45,239
Yardley, it's a very long list
of beneficiaries.

363
00:20:45,240 --> 00:20:47,759
I have a weakness
for powerful women.

364
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:49,680
What is it, every woman
you've ever met?

365
00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:53,520
Oh, so I only get 40 quid.

366
00:20:55,800 --> 00:20:57,679
Why is Superbreast on here?

367
00:20:57,680 --> 00:21:00,960
I swear on my life,
we're only friends.

368
00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:17,439
THEY LAUGH

369
00:21:17,440 --> 00:21:19,400
INCREASED LAUGHTER

370
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:26,600
JOINS IN LAUGHTER

371
00:21:29,600 --> 00:21:31,880
Yeah, we did it. They're all dead.

372
00:21:33,360 --> 00:21:36,440
It really makes you think
about what's important.

373
00:21:39,360 --> 00:21:44,280
This film is dedicated to anyone
who's had a bad experience online.

374
00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:51,559
ALL:
considering what we've done

375
00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:56,439
? We breached the online citadel
And took out the evil scum

376
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:58,400
? Spend some time. ?

377
00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:04,159
The film was a beautiful triumph,
but the residents of Smiling Spring

378
00:22:04,160 --> 00:22:08,599
had failed to instil their offspring
with suitable attention spans.

379
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:11,119
Glued to the wrong kind of screen.

380
00:22:11,120 --> 00:22:13,319
We need to make
conscription mandatory.

381
00:22:13,320 --> 00:22:15,119
Hey, pay attention.

382
00:22:15,120 --> 00:22:16,880
Even Jess seemed distracted.

383
00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:23,319
I should probably
give her more credit.

384
00:22:23,320 --> 00:22:26,159
Ultimately, she was the only one
who truly understood

385
00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:28,480
the secret message at
the heart of our movie.

386
00:22:31,160 --> 00:22:33,799
? Spend some time. ?

387
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:38,400
It's not easy, it's not convenient,
but it's worthwhile.

388
00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:41,519
If you are related to someone,

389
00:22:41,520 --> 00:22:44,679
you need to make the effort
to speak to them

390
00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:46,160
before they go up to heaven.

391
00:22:47,320 --> 00:22:49,360
? Spend some time

392
00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:54,119
? Spend some time. ?

393
00:22:54,120 --> 00:22:57,039
I've never had a raisin
just by itself.

394
00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:59,919
Just always part of a cake.

395
00:22:59,920 --> 00:23:03,839
Even though they hated your guts,
you still helped them.

396
00:23:03,840 --> 00:23:05,639
Nobody wants to feel unloved.

397
00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:09,079
You see the best in people.
It's a very commendable trait.

398
00:23:09,080 --> 00:23:12,320
Yeah, it is. That's right.
You have a kind heart.

399
00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:19,359
Guys, let's make a pact.
We never work with old people again.

400
00:23:19,360 --> 00:23:21,119
Amen.

401
00:23:21,120 --> 00:23:24,199
Thanks for watching.
Have a great weekend.

402
00:23:24,200 --> 00:23:27,039
? It was a very old bridge
A very old bridge

403
00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:29,239
? A very old bridge indeed

404
00:23:29,240 --> 00:23:31,839
? A very big oval, very big oval

405
00:23:31,840 --> 00:23:33,759
{\an8}? Very big oval seed

406
00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:36,439
{\an8}? It was a very old bridge
A very old bridge

407
00:23:36,440 --> 00:23:38,879
{\an8}? A very old bridge indeed

408
00:23:38,880 --> 00:23:43,599
{\an8}? A very big oval, very big oval
Very big oval seed

409
00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:46,279
{\an8}? It was a very long walk
A very long walk... ?

410
00:23:46,280 --> 00:23:48,279
SAM: Turn off that crap!

411
00:23:48,280 --> 00:23:51,280
Subtitles by Red Bee Media

412
00:23:51,330 --> 00:23:55,880
Repair and Synchronization by
Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0


